Do You Trust Me?

Trust. A simple 5-letter word. Right?

Wrong. TRUST is easily written and easily talked about. But I would beg to differ that it is quite possibly the hardest thing you could ever do. To trust someone requires that you put your life into someone else's hands. You don't get to decide where you go or what you do. You don't get to decide what path to take. You don't even get to know what lies ahead. You have to have complete confidence that whatever you are trusting in is capable of finding the best life for you and taking you there.

What human do you know that is willing to give control of their life to someone else? I know that everyday I struggle with this very thing. I want to control what happens. I want to control who, what, where, when and why for EVERY detail of my life. I see the path ahead that I have made for myself and I pull hard to go in that direction. But there is a hand guiding me somewhere else. That hand is taking me somewhere I cannot see. Into darkness, around corners, through valleys of fire, through caves that seem to have no end.

I NEVER understand why life curves places I would never take it. It is SO hard to trust that what I go through is really for the best. But it is. I know it is. Because I LONG to have complete confidence in the one who knows everything.

I can't imagine what life would be like if my God was not capable of figuring life out. What if my god were only made of stone, with no spirit, no passion, no heart. I couldn't trust that. What if my god was imagined? What if my god were made into what I wanted him to be? He would be no better than my mind or my eyes. He could know no more than me. So how could I trust that he sees the future more than myself? What if my god were one in a million? How would I know that I am following the right path? What if there were no god? Who or what would I be trusting??

I could trust in things. I could trust in money. I could trust in education. I could trust in success. But I. Would. Be. Let. Down. Things and money just pass away. We can't hold firmly to them. Education and Success would be a temporary hope, but could guide you no where. You would still be relying on as far as a human mind could go.

I could be trusting man and man alone. And every time I. Would. Be. Let. Down. Man (human) never ceases to let others down. Humans are only capable of seeing one small part of life at a time. Human hearts are not always pure or confident or able. Humans are imperfect beings who make mistakes, who lack judgment, who suffer from pain and brokenness. If we only had each other to lean on and to trust, what good would that be?

And what if my God were greater, and stronger than any other. What if my God were awesome in power, able to heal? What if my God were real, mighty, all-knowing. What if my God were perfect in every way and had eyes to see EVERYTHING that lies behind me and before me. What if my God saw my heart and what I really longed for. What if my God cried when tears fell from my eyes and smiled when my heart was filled with joy. What if my God were my true best friend and loved everything about me. What if my God was completely able to fulfill every emptiness, every passion, every longing, and every hope and dream. Would I then be able to trust him completely with my life?

For my God is an everlasting God, the Alpha and Omega. He was there in the beginning and he will be there until the end. He knows everything about me. He stretches out his hand and whispers to my heart. "Do you trust me?"

Yes God, I trust you. I long to trust you. Sometimes you will feel my heart pulling away because I don't fully understand. But in the end, I'm going to shout and I'm going to sing "I'm gonna trust in God". Sometimes you will hear me pout and whine and cry out in pain because it hurts to go through everything you have called me to. But I'm gonna trust in you.

TRUST. The hardest word in the dictionary. I have to be willing to say "my life is not my own. My life belongs to someone else. He is in control. He is going to take me where I need to go. He is fully capable of taking care of my every need and filling my every longing. His timing is perfect. Hie ways are perfect. His ability is perfect. His mind is perfect. His path is perfect. My life is following him despite my failures, despite my fears, despite my misunderstandings. My life is worth it. He is in control. I can trust the One who knows it all".